We’ve been taught that strength means holding on. But true power often lies in knowing when to let go. This post explores the surprising side of strength through philosophy, fitness, and real life.
When Strength Starts to Hurt
There’s a peculiar kind of pain that comes from holding on too long.
To the wrong people.
To outdated dreams.
To identities that once served you—but now shrink you.
I once held a 100kg deadlift at lockout for an Instagram video. My grip gave out. My ego didn’t.
The likes poured in. My lower back screamed for a week.
And that’s when it hit me:
We train so hard to hold on—but no one teaches us how to let go.
The Grip That Broke Me
There was a time—somewhere between agency deadlines and spiritual detachment—where I believed strength meant silence. Stillness. Stoicism.
If something hurt, I’d out-breathe it.
If someone left, I’d “focus on my goals.”
If I was falling apart, I’d find a gym, a cold shower, a mantra. Anything to not feel weak.
But during a solo trip in Himachal, an old man watching me meditate said:
“Strength is not how long you sit still. It’s how deeply you’re willing to soften.”
That line hit me harder than any deadlift PR.
Rewriting the Strength Narrative
We’ve been fed this macho myth:
Strength = pushing through
Strength = not crying
Strength = never showing fear
But the Gita doesn’t say, “Be tough.” It says, Be present.
Buddha didn’t say, “Hold your breath.” He said, Observe it.
And every barbell I’ve ever lifted eventually said, “Let go or break.”
The Ancient View on Real Strength
- Vedanta: Detachment doesn’t mean apathy. It means presence without possession.
- Stoicism: You control effort, not outcome. Strength lies in this surrender.
- Taoism: The flexible survives. The rigid shatters.
In short? Strength isn’t tightness. It’s truth. It’s knowing what’s yours to carry and what’s asking to be released.
When Holding On Becomes Harm
What we think is strength:
- Forcing a relationship to work
- Hustling with no rest
- Powering through emotional numbness
What’s actually strength:
- Ending something with love
- Taking a break without shame
- Admitting: “I’m tired, and that’s okay.”
Just like muscles need rest to grow, your spirit needs release to evolve.
How to Practice Letting Go (Without Losing Yourself)
1. Micro-Surrenders:
Let go of needing to answer every message immediately.
Let go of training through injury.
Let go of posting that “motivational” quote when you feel like crap.
2. Drop the Mental Barbell:
Ask yourself: “What am I gripping that no longer serves me?”
It could be:
- A role you’ve outgrown
- A project past its expiry
- An identity that keeps you small
3. Switch from Force to Flow
Instead of “How can I win this?”, ask “What is this moment asking of me?”
That shift? That’s strength.
A Quick Muscle Metaphor: Grip Strength vs Growth Strength
| False Strength | True Strength |
|---|---|
| Holding at all costs | Releasing when needed |
| Tension in every step | Grace in each movement |
| Always in control | Comfortable in surrender |
| Fear of falling | Trusting the process |
Strong Enough to Soften
I used to think the goal was to be unbreakable.
But the real flex?
Is being breakable—and still choosing to open your heart. To try again. To keep going.
The tree bends in the storm, not because it’s weak—but because it wants to live.
📩 Your Next Lift Might Be a Let-Go
So here’s your challenge this week:
Find one thing to drop.
One grudge. One expectation. One task that feels like self-betrayal.
And then—breathe.
Not to escape, but to arrive.
Letting go isn’t weakness. It’s wisdom.
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📲 Share this with a friend who’s gripping too tight lately
Next Up in the Series:
💫 “The Flexibility Trap: Why Adaptability Doesn’t Mean Losing Yourself”
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