YogiWrites

1. Where Hurt Clings Like Old Dust

Some memories don’t knock politely.
They barge in uninvited—
on quiet mornings with chai,
in between reps at the gym,
or during that one bhajan that hits just too close.

You feel it in your gut.
That old betrayal. The words they said. The hug they never gave.
And before you know it, you’re not in 2025 anymore…
You’re right back in that moment. The wound. The silence. The ache.

Forgiveness? Sounds poetic in a yoga reel.
But in real life?
It’s messy, tangled, and often feels like giving a free pass to someone who didn’t earn it.

But let me tell you something honest and ugly:
Not forgiving is like drinking poison every morning… and expecting them to suffer.

2. A Ride to Rishikesh, A Lesson in Letting Go

I once held a grudge for 11 years.
Yeah. Eleven. That’s not a typo.
And no, it wasn’t against an ex or a distant cousin—
It was against my own best friend.

Let’s call him Arjun. We were inseparable in college. Shared maggi, mimicked professors, even flunked the same subject together. Brotherhood-level bonding.

Until he betrayed my trust in the dumbest yet deepest way possible.
He stole an opportunity—one I had worked for.
Didn’t say sorry. Didn’t explain. Just vanished into the professional ether like a ghost with a LinkedIn profile.

Fast forward to a random trip to Rishikesh.

I was there to detox—not from carbs, but from chaos. A week of silence, satsang, and sarcasm-free existence. Or so I thought.

And who do I bump into outside the German Bakery?

Yup. Arjun. Wearing loose linen pants and that “I read Osho now” look.

My fists clenched. Heart raced. Mind said “Just walk away”.
But soul whispered, “You didn’t come here to run.”

We sat. Awkward silence marinated the air.
He looked me in the eye and said:

“I messed up. I was scared. And stupid. But I’ve lived with that guilt every single day.”

Now I could’ve given him a TED talk on betrayal. Or launched into a spiritual monologue.
Instead, I just said, “I know.”

That was it.

And I swear to you—something heavy left my body that day.
Like a stone rolled off my chest. I felt… clean. Not morally superior. Just light.

3. Forgiveness is a Selfish Act (And That’s Okay)

Let’s deconstruct the myth:
Forgiveness doesn’t mean you approve what happened.
It means you’re done carrying it.

Imagine dragging a sack of garbage on your back for years. It starts to stink. Ruins your relationships. Taints your joy.
Forgiveness is simply… dropping the sack.

In the Bhagavad Gita, Krishna never says “forget the war.”
He says “act from a place of dharma, not ego.”
And sometimes, that dharma is releasing anger not because they deserve peace…
but because you do.

Forgiveness is not about them.
It’s about freeing the hostage—and the hostage is you.

4. Okay, But HOW Do I Forgive?

Let’s get practical.
You’re not in an ashram or sipping tulsi tea under a Bodhi tree.
You’re dealing with toxic managers, emotionally unavailable parents, ghosting exes, and that one friend who still owes you money.

So here’s your real-world forgiveness toolkit:

A. Name the Hurt

Write it down. What exactly did they do?
What expectation did they break? Get specific.

B. Feel It Without Editing

Cry. Punch a pillow. Journal.
Don’t spiritually bypass. Emotions are compost—they fertilize growth.

C. Say It (Even if Only to Yourself)

“What you did hurt me. But I choose to release you from the prison I built in my mind.”

You may have to say it 30 times before it sticks. That’s okay. Repetition is reprogramming.

D. Set Boundaries, Not Walls

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you let them walk back in barefoot with dirty feet.
It means you close the door gently—not slam it or leave it wide open.

5. Letting Go is a Daily Practice, Not a Grand Finale

I didn’t become a forgiveness guru after Rishikesh.
I still catch myself judging people who hurt me.
But now, I breathe through it.
I remind myself: This is not who I want to be anymore.

Each act of letting go is a vote for your peace.
It’s slow. Unsexy. But powerful.

So the next time someone brings up that person, and your jaw clenches?
Smile internally, sip your coffee, and think—
“Already forgiven. Not for them. For me.”

And hey, if you’re still holding onto something… maybe it’s time to finally drop that sack.

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