Discover why anxiety might be your mind’s way of protecting you, like an overprotective Indian aunty. Learn practical wisdom for befriending your worries through spirituality, mindfulness, and real-life stories from Mumbai to the meditation cushion.
The Aunty Who Never Sleeps
You know that aunty – the one who calls you seventeen times when you’re five minutes late, asks if you’ve eaten every hour, and somehow always knows when you’re about to make a questionable life decision. She means well, but bhagwan, does she exhaust you.
Your anxiety is exactly like her.
Last Tuesday, I found myself hyperventilating in a Mumbai auto-rickshaw, my heart hammering like tabla beats at a wedding. The driver was weaving through traffic with the confidence of someone who clearly had Lord Ganesha’s personal phone number. My mind, meanwhile, had already written my obituary, planned my funeral playlist (heavy on the Kishore Kumar), and was wondering if my mother would blame my life choices for this untimely demise.
When My Mind Became Mumbai Traffic
The Auto-Rickshaw Revelation
“Bhai, thoda slow,” I managed to tell the driver, my voice shakier than a rickety ceiling fan.
He laughed. “Sir, anxiety mein ho? Traffic mein slow means late. Late means angry wife. Angry wife means…” He made a throat-slitting gesture that did nothing for my nervous system.
But something clicked in that moment of pure terror mixed with his casual wisdom. My anxiety wasn’t trying to kill me – it was desperately trying to keep me alive. Just like my mother’s friend Priya aunty, who still calls to remind me to carry an umbrella when there’s a 2% chance of rain three districts away.
The realization hit me harder than the potholes we were bouncing over: What if anxiety isn’t a malfunction? What if it’s a feature?
The Overprotective Operating System
Think about it. Your anxiety has been your unpaid security guard since childhood, working 24/7 shifts without so much as a tea break. It remembers every embarrassing moment from class 7, every time you got your heart broken, every job interview that went sideways. It’s building a fortress around you, one worry at a time.
The problem? It’s building the fortress with the architectural skills of someone who learned construction from watching too many Bollywood films. Everything is dramatic, over-the-top, and designed to withstand an apocalypse when all you need is protection from a light drizzle.
The Bhagavad Gita of Worry
Ancient Wisdom, Modern Neuroses
Krishna told Arjuna to do his duty without attachment to results. Easy for Krishna to say – he was literally divine and probably didn’t have to worry about LinkedIn notifications or whether his startup idea was absolute trash.
But here’s what our ancient texts got right: they never said “don’t feel.” They said “feel, but don’t be controlled by the feeling.”
Your anxiety is information, not instruction.
When Arjuna froze on the battlefield, paralyzed by the magnitude of his situation, Krishna didn’t say, “Just think positive thoughts, bro.” He acknowledged the fear, the overwhelm, the very human response to an impossible situation. Then he offered perspective.
The Meditation Mat Incident
Three months ago, I decided to “get serious” about meditation. You know how it goes – downloaded seven apps, bought a overpriced cushion, set an alarm for 5 AM, and prepared to achieve enlightenment by Thursday.
Day one: I sat down, closed my eyes, and my brain immediately became a highlight reel of every awkward thing I’d ever said, every deadline I was behind on, and a detailed analysis of whether that weird noise my laptop was making meant imminent technological disaster.
I opened my eyes, frustrated. “This meditation thing is impossible! My mind won’t shut up!”
Then I remembered what my yoga teacher Kamala didi had said: “Beta, you don’t tell the river to stop flowing. You learn to swim.”
Your anxious thoughts aren’t enemies to defeat – they’re currents to navigate.
The Art of Aunty Management
Setting Boundaries with Your Internal Priya Aunty
Here’s what I learned from actually listening to my anxiety instead of fighting it:
Acknowledge the concern. When your mind starts spiraling about that presentation next week, don’t dismiss it. Say, “Thanks for caring about my professional reputation, Brain. I hear you.”
Assess the reality. Is this a genuine threat requiring action, or is this Aunty-brain catastrophizing again? Most times, it’s the latter.
Take loving action. If there’s something real to address, address it. If not, thank your anxiety for its service and gently redirect.
I started talking to my anxiety like I talk to my actual overprotective relatives: with love, humor, and firm boundaries.
“Listen, Brain-aunty,” I’d say during particularly intense worry sessions. “I appreciate that you’re looking out for me. But I’ve got this. You can take a chai break now.”
The Gratitude Plot Twist
The wildest part? I started feeling grateful for my anxiety.
Not in a toxic positivity way – I’m not about to start a gratitude journal entry with “Today I’m thankful for my crippling self-doubt.” But genuine appreciation for this part of me that cares so much about my wellbeing that it’s willing to be the villain in my story.
Your anxiety has kept you alive through heartbreaks, helped you prepare for important moments, and pushed you to consider consequences before leaping. It’s been your wingman, even when it felt like your worst enemy.
The Modern Life Reality Check
Living in the Age of Infinite Scroll
Our ancestors’ anxiety had clear, finite problems: Is that a tiger? Is there enough grain for winter? Will the monsoon come?
Our anxiety has to process: global warming, 47 WhatsApp groups, the economy, whether that person who viewed our Instagram story but didn’t reply to our text is mad at us, and also, somehow, tigers. Because tigers still exist and nature documentaries have made us acutely aware of this fact.
No wonder our internal Priya aunty is having a breakdown.
The solution isn’t to eliminate anxiety – it’s to help it evolve. To teach it the difference between actual threats and the mental equivalent of forwarded messages about how holding your phone wrong will cause cancer.
The Practice of Gentle Rebellion
Start small. When anxiety suggests you check your email for the fourteenth time today, rebel gently. “Thanks for the suggestion, Brain-aunty. I’m going to make tea instead.”
When it insists you need to have a backup plan for your backup plan’s backup plan, smile and say, “I hear you. Let’s take one step first and see what happens.”
This isn’t about becoming reckless – it’s about becoming response-able instead of reactive.
The Closing Bell
Your anxiety isn’t broken. It’s just been promoted beyond its competence level.
Like that uncle who gives unsolicited career advice despite never having changed jobs in thirty years, your anxiety is operating with outdated information and unlimited enthusiasm.
The goal isn’t to fire it – it’s to give it a new job description. Instead of Chief Catastrophe Officer, maybe it can be Head of Reasonable Precautions. Instead of running your entire life, maybe it can just manage the really important stuff.
And maybe, just maybe, you can learn to laugh with it instead of fighting against it. After all, we’re all just trying to figure this out as we go, one overprotective thought at a time.
Next week, I’m writing about why your perfectionism is actually your inner overachiever who never learned to take lunch breaks. Stay tuned, and remember – you’re doing better than you think.
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